


If I could have one wish

by Welsper



Category: Final Fantasy X
Genre: Bonding, Braska's Pilgrimage, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-05
Updated: 2019-08-05
Packaged: 2020-07-20 10:15:54
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,668
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19990474
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Welsper/pseuds/Welsper
Summary: When she asked him, he wished he had no such bond to offer her.Perhaps then, this would not hurt so much.





	If I could have one wish

**Author's Note:**

  * For [pettycoat](https://archiveofourown.org/users/pettycoat/gifts).



Jecht was so… different.

They had been travelling together for some time now, and still, this man from Jecht fascinated Braska, surprised him at every turn. His fights with Auron also gave him headaches.

They were like fire and ice, those two.

Always bickering, disagreeing over which way to go and how to fight. To listen to their voices became comfort for Braska after a while and when they lay asleep at night, he almost missed the tumults of the day.

“What’s it like, your Zanarkand?” Auron asked as he was poking the fire. They had set up camp near Macalania Temple. Jecht looked up with surprise in his eyes. The only way Auron ever addressed him was to chide him for something. Not ask him about tales he professed to not believe.

“It’s… nothing like Spira. The sky never really goes dark at night, like here. The lights are too bright for that.”

Jecht looked up into the night sky.

“I haven’t ever seen stars like this back home. I never knew how beautiful it was...”

“How do the lights never go out?”

“Well, I don’t know why you never do it here, but it’s powered by machina! I know you got them too, how come you barely use them?”

“They… they are one of the things that have brought us Sin,” Braska said. “It draws him. Any city that gets too big gets destroyed. The only ones that really use them these days are the Al Bhed.”

“Huh. So that’s why they call us heretics? Because you had a kid with one of those Al Bhed? That’s just stupid. There’s nothing wrong with trying to go forward.”

Jecht pointed at Braska.

“Don’t you ever let them tell you you were wrong for choosing to have a kid! Or for loving! Kids are a treasure. Even if they’re little shits.” There was a flicker of pain in his eyes, and Braska reached out. Jecht’s skin was warm, blazing even in the cold of Macalania. He seemed grateful for the gesture.

“That’s why we have to fight,” Auron said. “So Spira can move forward. And maybe… more children won’t have to lose their fathers,” he added, more quietly.

Braska’s pain was sharp in his heart when he thought of little Yuna, back in Bevelle. She had lost her mother so soon, and now… he would never see her again. But if he lost heart now, turned back, then she might die either way, taken by Sin. And with her, countless other children. Braska owed it to them to continue his pilgrimage.

“You should record something for Tidus,” Braska said as he watched Jecht fiddle with the sphere recorder.

“Huh? But I do that all the time!”

“You record other things. Fights, fiends, festivals. I never see you talk to him.”

“He… look, he might not actually want to hear it. I’m sure that comes as a great surprise to you, but I wasn’t actually great at this father thing. Too busy playing and partying, pushing him to do things he wasn’t ready for...”

“I figured that,” Braska said. Jecht was turning into a dependable man, and he was every bit a guardian as Auron was. Braska was glad to have him with him. But the man was also brash and loud, and often drunk. That might have been the only Jecht his son had ever known.

“We have all done things we regret, Jecht.” Braska out a hand on Jecht’s bare shoulder and smiled when he felt the man lean into the touch. He looked so calm and peaceful, illuminated by the light of Macalania Lake. Thankfully, even his guardians could relax once in a while, for all Braska’s journey made them go through.

“But we should still atone for them. You might never see him again.”

Braska turned to leave.

“Leave him something. It is good enough to try. I am sure your feelings will reach him.”

“Guess I’ll send a greeting to the runt… but hey, you gotta record one for little Yuna too! I’m sure she’d love to see something of her dad. Maybe… maybe one day they can watch it together. Laugh about their old dads.”

They always worked together when it came to the Trials, Auron and Jecht. No matter their differences and fights, they knew higher things were at stake. Even Jecht, who still did not know about everything a pilgrimage was really about.

“The Aeon. Is it a woman this time?” Jecht loved the hymn that echoed within the temples by the lonely Fayth, and always listened happily whenever Braska indulged him and sang it for him. It was one of the things that seemed to be the same in his Zanarkand too. Braska wondered where it came from. They didn’t have Fayth and as such, aeon in Jecht’s home.

“Her name is Shiva. I pray she will accept me.”

“Of course she will, you’re great! Who wouldn’t want to travel with you? Is she pretty?”

Auron hit him over the head and rolled his eyes. Jecht simply laughed. This was certainly not proper, and nothing like Braska had ever envisioned his own pilgrimage going, but to have Jecht here with them, improper and loud as he was, it lifted his spirits.

“A giant fiend that attacks chocobos…” Braska crossed his arms. They had been trying to track the fiend for a while now, mostly at Jecht’s insistence. The man was quite fond of Chocobos, and Braska more than once had seen him sneak a cuddle from the big birds when he thought no one was looking. It made Braska even fonder of him.  
Jecht looked anxious, angry and ready for a fight. Braska had no doubt that Chocobo Eater would have an absolutely terrible time once Jecht got his hands on it.

“Hmph. What’s it waiting for? Hey! Come out and fight!”

Auron sighed as he was recording their little sidequest. “I told you this was a waste of time.”

Jecht wouldn’t have that. He had grown so fond of this Spira, even if everyone he loved was back in his own Zanarkand. There was no way he could stand by and watch as Chocobos got eaten and people lost their livelihood. He had become quite the Guardian. Not only of Braska, but the people as well.

“Hey, come on! It’s the right thing to do! Everyone’s depending on us. Besides, it’s good practice.”

Braska laughed at that and he thought he could hear Auron chuckle too.

“I guess you’re right,” Auron said and Braska could sense the fondness in his voice. He too, had grown quite attached to Jecht. They did still enjoy their fights, however. But these days, they liked fighting together more than against one another.  
“Well, then...” Braska said to Jecht, who was practically bursting with excitement. He nearly fell over when the ground shook and their foe finally showed itself. It was huge and Braska could tell it would be a hard fight. Luckily, he had two very dependable men with him.

“There it is! Auron! Let’s get ‘im!” Jecht shouted.

“Right!”

Before Braska could even cast any charms on them, they were already going off. Auron had often chided Jecht on his brashness, but it seemed they both started to influence each other a little. He picked up the dropped sphere recorder before following them into battle.

“We did it!”

The sound of Jecht’s laughter was like a soothing melody to Braska. He sat there on his knees, panting, as he tried to get his bearings back. He cast Curaga on all of them, and heard Auron breath a sigh of relief. The pyreflies of the fiend faded and Braska wished it the happiness in afterlife it couldn’t get in all those years wandering Spira.

“That thing you did with the… that was amazing!” Jecht grasped Auron by the shoulders, excited, always so excited.

“Not too bad yourself,” Auron muttered. Braska smiled to himself. Auron said it grumblingly, but he could see the corners of his mouth twitching upwards, and heard the fondness in his voice. He wasn’t shaking Jecht off either, like he had done so often before.

“I feel like I can do anything when I’m with you two,” Jecht added, more quietly. He hadn’t taken his hands from Auron. They wandered down, until he was holding him by the waist. Braska chuckled as Jecht learned forward and kissed Auron. That had been a while coming.

“ _You,”_ Auron gasped as Jecht drew back. “Have a wife.” It sounded more like Auron was scrambling for some sort of excuse. Braska could see the flush on his cheeks. It was quite endearing.

“We fell apart a long time ago. She’s a great mother, much better than I am a father, but we didn’t work out. If that’s what stopping you, don’t worry about it.”

Jecht looked at them with those dark eyes. He was always brash, always jumping in head-first, when Braska or even Auron might have hesitated, weighing their options. If he wanted something, he’d try to get it.

But now, he was waiting. For an answer. For permission.

He had it.

They fell together, men on a journey that lead to certain death and perhaps salvation, seeking what little comfort remained to them in this world, threatening to tear apart. Seeking camaraderie and friendship and love. A short reprieve from the pain that lingered everywhere.

Braska hummed quietly as Jecht let his fingers run through his hair. His breath was still coming in sharply when those of the other two men had calmed. He didn’t quite have their stamina, but to be shown what they could do with it had been very enjoyable.

“I knew you weren’t that boring,” Jecht broke the silence. There was a huge grin on his face. Auron boxed him in the shoulder, but he was smiling too. Their long, dark hair was matted to their skin with sweat, their cheeks flushed and they had never looked more lovely to Braska. Even with all their bruises and scratches from their fights. They shielded him with their bodies and swords and Braska was glad, that even beyond white magic to heal them, there was something like this he could give them for their efforts.

“I am sorry, Jecht.”

There was no comfort Braska knew to give. Jecht was silent as the ruins of Zanarkand opened up before them. The closer they had gotten to the end of their journey, the less they believed this would have a happy ending for any of them.

But still, Braska had held onto the hope that maybe Jecht would find a way home, to his son. Make up for lost time and bad decisions. Sometimes Braska had caught himself, thinking what it would be like if they could stay together. Be a family. Jecht talked so much about Tidus Braska could almost see the little boy before his eyes. That maybe, they could all live together on Besaid Island, see the children grow up together. But now it was clear. Neither Tidus nor Yuna would ever see their fathers again. Braska would die and Jecht would be trapped here. Braska only hoped Auron’s and Jecht’s bond would not fall apart. Maybe Yuna would like to play Blitzball too?

The fiends were numerous and powerful in Zanarkand, but the three of them had become strong too. Braska felt ready for his final task. The one all summoners prepared themselves for. He would be the one to give Spira peace, however fleeting it might be. He was ready now. He would perish, but everyone else would live. Auron and Jecht would live, and so would Yuna and Tidus.

Yunalesca destroyed his selfish dream of Jecht and Auron living on.

“This is the only way we got now! Fine. Make me the fayth. I been doing some thinking. My dream is back in the other Zanarkand. I wanted to make that runt into a star blitz player. Show him the view from the top, you know. But now I know there’s no way home for me. I’m never gonna see him again. My dream’s never gonna come true. So make me the fayth. I’ll fight Sin with you, Braska. Then maybe my life will have meaning, you know.”

“Your dream is in Zanarkand?!”

Auron looked stricken. Poor, true Auron. He had known far longer what would await Braska at the end, and for a while he thought Auron had made his peace with it. But he hadn’t. Braska loved him, utterly, now and forever, until the day Sin might be no more.

It was a cruelty. Braska would offer it all, for Spira and all her people, it was his duty as a summoner. And if Sin would still return, then perhaps the short Calm would be enough. Enough for Yuna to grow up in peace, to make her own happiness. But if it had been allowed to him, a selfish wish beyond, Braska had hoped that his two guardians could have seen it too. Quiet, and peace.

“Did Lord Braska mean nothing to you then? Did I mean nothing to you? What were we to you? Distraction?”

“Come on, Auron...”

“No, I will not! If you live… there may be another way! We’ll think of something, I know!”

Auron staggered forward, and wrapped his arms around Jecht, holding onto him like a drowning man might hold onto a plank in open water.

“Please, Jecht… we can give your life another meaning,” Auron muttered, hiding his face against Jecht’s shoulder. Jecht regarded him with one of those warm smiles that made Braska’s heart flutter. Now, it threatened to tear it apart.

“Sin always comes back,” Auron went on, his voice shaking. Braska couldn’t see his face, but he knew he was crying. He stepped forward and wrapped his arms around the two men, his guardians, his loves.

“It comes back after the Calm every time! The cycle will continue and your deaths will mean nothing!”

Braska kissed the top of Auron’s head. Gently, he coaxed his face up, a hand on his chin. Auron’s lips tasted like tears.

“But there’s always a chance it won’t come back this time. It’s worth trying,” Braska whispered.

“Worth trying?! You ask me to let you two march to your death, for… for almost nothing, for a farce, for cruelly letting the people believe they are safe.”

Auron’s fists were buried in the hem of Braska’s robe. As if he could keep him with him. Make them stay. Braska almost wished he could. But this was his path. He had made peace with it a long time ago. He just wished he could grant Auron the same peace.

“I understand what you’re saying, Auron. I’ll find a way to break the cycle.”

“You… have a plan?”

“Jecht?”

Jecht sounded so sure, Braska wanted to believe him. But he wouldn’t answer them. But if anyone could break the eternal cycle of Spira’s sorrow, perhaps it was someone who was not from Spira at all. Not this Spira. Someone whose people, whose family was not threatened by Sin, but who chose to step up to protect those that were anyway.

Braska and Jecht carefully stepped away from Auron, who looked nothing like a noble warrior monk now, a fearsome guardian, but only like a lost, lonely man. Braska had wanted so much better for him. But it had to be this way.

Braska’s heart ached sharply at the hope in Auron’s eyes, before it was snuffed out the moment he noticed the pyreflies. Jecht’s pyreflies, conjuring up one last memory of himself.

“Can I ask you one last favor?” Jecht asked and Auron stepped closer. Raised a hand, as if to reach out and touch him. Then thought better of it. Braska turned away for a moment. He couldn’t bear to look at it. As summoner, his duty was to protect all of Spira, but right now, all he wished for was to be able to protect those two from this pain.

“Uh… Nah. Never mind.”

Auron shook his head, almost desperately. “Out with it!”

“Okay. Listen good. Take care of Tidus... He’s such a crybaby. He needs someone there to hold his hand, see? Take care of him, will you?”

Poor Auron. He would be left behind, when Braska and Jecht were long gone. And both of them had tasked him with such a burden. But who else to entrust the safety of their children to? Auron would love them, as he had loved them.

“But how am I supposed to go to Zanarkand?”

“Hey! You said it yourself! There must be a way to get there, right? You’ll find it.”

“If anyone can do it, it is you,” Braska said. He took Auron’s hand, when he saw Jecht trying to do it, and failing. Auron’s hand was warm in his. He wished Jecht could feel it.

“All right, I will! I give you my word. I’ll take care of Tidus. I’ll guard him with my life.”

“Thanks, Auron,” Jecht said, and he sounded truly grateful. “You were always such a stiff, but that’s what I loved about you.”

Jecht’s apparition reached out one last time, a ghostly touch upon the two men, before the pyreflies burst from his body and scattered.

“I loved you, too,” Auron said quietly. Braska pulled him closer. He didn’t know how he was going to do it again, make Auron say goodbye. Leave him behind, for good this time. Leave him all alone. But for Spira, he must. For Yuna, he must.

Sin awaited them, in the Calm Lands. The final judge of whether Braska’s resolve was strong enough, whether his love and bond to Jecht and Auron was strong enough. Jecht, to take Sin down as the Final Aeon Braska would ever call forth and Auron, to protect Braska long enough to finish the casting.

Braska sank to his knees when he felt this final Aeon ripped out of him after Sin fell. Jecht’s spirit was taken from him, and he had never known anything could _hurt_ so much. Did he have some romantic notion of quietly fading away? For all his training, he had never expected this. His staff fell to the ground as pyreflies engulfed the lands. Scattering everywhere and Braska thought it would be beautiful, if he wasn’t in such agony.

“Braska!” Auron hurried over to his side and Braska so wished to wrap his arms around him, hold him tight. But he could no longer lift his arms. At least Auron had made it… He would live, hopefully find some happiness in this Calm Jecht had brought them.

“Take care of our children, Auron,” Braska said quietly as the last of his strength waned. The last thing he saw before his eyes closed were tears falling down from his guardian’s and love’s eyes. He saw relief. Sadness.

And anger.

Braska woke to the sound of a roaring waterfall. When he sat up, he could feel soft grass and flowers under his hands. It was over, then. Whatever fate befell Spira now, it was out of his hands.

Maybe they had managed it. Maybe this time, the Calm would be eternal.

But there was this nagging thought at the back of his mind.

What had that thing been? He thought he had seen something, when the pyreflies had risen from Sin’s corpse. Whirling around in the air, going from Sin to what Jecht had become. It filled him with a sense of dread and he hoped it had just been his imagination, his exhausted and dying mind playing tricks on him.

There was nothing he could do about it now, either way.

They were long years. He saw many things in the Farplane, many people, from his time and all other times. He saw Yuna’s mother again and together they looked on with sadness-stained pride as their little girl grew up and walked the same path Braska had. Became a summoner to free Spira if but for a moment. She was so young. Too young.

So was Jecht’s son, always at her side. Auron had kept him safe then, and brought him here like Jecht had wanted.

Jecht never appeared. Had he gone to some other place, to a Farplane for his Zanarkand? Or perhaps Braska had doomed his soul forever when he had made him the Final Aeon. There might be nothing left that could come down here.

Braska smiled when he felt a familiar presence.

“Took you two long enough.”

“Told you I had a plan!”

With a laugh, Braska toppled over on his back as Jecht half-tackled, half-hugged him. Jecht waved his arm and Auron didn’t resist long, flopping on top of them, the hatred and anger and sorrow gone from him with his sending.

_Thank you, Yuna._

“You two never gave up, did you?”

Braska made no attempt to mask the fondness in his voice. He had missed them.

“Couldn’t have shown my face down here if I did.”

“Thank you, Jecht.” Braska pressed a kiss to the man’s dark skin.

“Hey now, I didn’t do it alone! I couldn’t have held out without the memory of you two, without knowing Auron would beat me up if I didn’t keep my promise even after he looked after my brat.” Auron chuckled at that, and it was a sound Braska had missed painfully in all those years wandering the Farplane. He had accepted his death even when he had still been living. Still, to know that out there might be the two men he loved so dearly, fighting a battle that wasn’t his any longer, it had pained him.

“Think we did a good job after all, us three heretics,” Jecht said with a satisfied tone in his voice. He pulled Braska and Auron close and the two men rested their heads on his shoulders.

Jecht looked up, into the swirl of pyreflies.

“World’s up to them now.”


End file.
